Repeat: sex is a consensual act

‘Man found dead was on child sex charges’

Alleged rape victim identified

Alleged rape victim identified

Well, you know what I’m going to say about that headline by now, don’t you?

After an emotional outburst in the Christchurch District Court as she gave evidence – and after the court was adjourned to give her time to compose herself – Jacqueline Howat told Judge Murray Abbott she wanted her name made public.

Complainants in sexual abuse cases have their names automatically suppressed.

However, after Howat’s unusual request, the judge made a special order allowing publication.

I think this was incredibly brave of her, particularly given the way the media frequently treats both rape survivors and sex workers, let alone those who are both.

She repeated her claim that she could identify the accused as the attacker, but agreed she had blocked out a lot of what happened on the night.

The “but” implies that these things are contradictory; they’re not. I think it was Maia who said to me recently that trials in such cases should include expert witness on how memory works during and after trauma. Suffice it to say that for her memory to work in this way is neither unusual nor illogical.

This headline says it all

‘Court hears details of alleged sexual assault of murdered girl’

In other words, they accept the murder happened but not the sexual assault. I wrote about this type of discrepancy here.

It’s still rape

There are a lot of good things about this article. I like the way it emphasises that rapists are not some strange subspecies that lives in dark alleyways but “fathers, brothers, husbands”. I am glad that they highlighted the abysmal rape conviction rate.

But then they spoiled it all by using the word ’sex’ in the headline and elsewhere. Sex with a woman who does not or cannot consent is rape. Sex with a woman who is being forced to do it by someone other than yourself is rape. Sex with a woman who you can reasonably suspect is not able to consent is still rape.

These men justify it by calling it anything other than rape. I wish the media would not allow them that comfort.

Sex vs Rape again

Salvation Army makes more payouts to sex victims

One more time (or two, or ten, or a million).

Sex is a consensual act between two individuals of an appropriate age to give true consent. Whilst it may be regretted, it is not something that has victims. This is not sex – it is rape and abuse.

Not about sex

‘Israeli president sex case delayed’

I’ve seen multiple headlines similar to this, and they annoy me no end.

It’s not a sex case. It’s not a sex trial. The men in such cases are not on trial for having sex (although sometimes their victims seem to be, but that’s another issue). It’s about rape and other forms of violence.